Is It You or Is Your Workplace Just Toxic?
Brace yourself for what’s coming.
Ed Note
“Emotions that arise from a toxic work environment seep into every aspect of your life. Get out! No job is worth that kind of misery." — LAWS OF MODERN WOMEN.
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So Shall We?
Last year, I worked a six-month contract with a company that left me anxious and constantly second-guessing myself.
I would turn in my deliverables and wait nervously for feedback. Sometimes, there were no responses. The only time feedback came was when something was “wrong.” It was never when I got it right.
Aside from this, there was no consistent communication or clarity. I was always on the edge, keeping my fingers crossed and hoping I had not missed something or misunderstood the brief.
To make matters worse, there was the money issue. Every month, I had to reach out to HR, sometimes follow up repeatedly just to get paid. Then I realised a fellow colleague of mine who had been there before me got paid with everyone else, and I didn’t. And so, for a long time, I thought it was a ME problem. I wanted to quit but I couldn’t because I needed the money. So I stayed until the contract ended.
The day it did, I felt a huge burden taken off me. I was so happy and relieved that I got myself a self-love cake to remind myself not to ever go through that again.
The next Sunday, I realised I was not scared or anxious about Monday, unlike before. That was when it hit me that I had just worked in a toxic place.
The thing is, toxicity at work doesn’t always look like yelling or inappropriate comments. Sometimes it is quiet, subtle and just sneaks up on you.
For instance:
You start overthinking every message you send, just to make sure you don’t sound “angry” or “too much.”
Everything feels urgent. One minute, you are trying to meet last-minute deadlines; the next, you are working through the weekend.
The only feedback you receive is when you mess up.
You brace yourself before every meeting because when you speak, you’re talked over or, even worse, ignored.
You’re scared to take time off because you might fall behind or be judged.
The only time you get important information or updates is through office whispers and not proper communication.
When you raise concerns, your feelings are dismissed, and you might even be told that you are being dramatic or doing “too much.”
Sooner or later, you start to wonder if you are the problem, your confidence starts slipping, and you begin to ask yourself what changed.
No one is yelling at you, but somehow, you’re still walking on eggshells, shrinking your voice, trying to fit into a space that felt like it was never made for you in the first place.
It is even harder when you are the only woman in the team. Frustrating and even exhausting, can't fully describe what you feel.
So, if any of these feels familiar, if you have ever doubted yourself because of a place that made you feel small, I want you to know that IT IS NOT YOU.
YOU ARE NOT TOO SENSITIVE AND YOU ARE NOT IMAGINING IT.
You deserve to work in a safe environment where your talent is not only valued but also respected.
P.S. If you have experienced any of these, kindly share your story in the comment section.
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